10 Tips for Supporting a Friend with Cancer

Supporting a friend battling cancer can feel challenging, but small, meaningful actions can make a world of difference. Here are six ways to offer genuine, compassionate support that respects your friend’s needs and brings comfort through their journey.

1. Be Present and Listen

One of the simplest yet most impactful ways to support your friend is to be there, both emotionally and physically when possible. Many people find it difficult to open up about their feelings or needs during cancer treatment, so being a patient, active listener is essential. Try not to steer the conversation or offer advice unless asked; just being a calm presence can be incredibly comforting. Let them talk freely about their experiences, fears, and hopes, or even about unrelated topics to help them find moments of normalcy and relief.

2. Offer Specific Help

Cancer treatments can be exhausting, and daily tasks can quickly become overwhelming. Instead of saying, “Let me know if you need anything,” which can put pressure on your friend to reach out, try offering specific help that you’re able to give. For example, you could say, “I’m free on Tuesday to help with groceries,” or “I’d love to bring you a home-cooked meal this weekend.” This direct approach makes it easier for your friend to accept your assistance and lessens their burden.

3. Learn About Their Condition and Treatments

Taking the time to understand your friend’s type of cancer, treatments, and potential side effects shows that you care and are making an effort to support them in a meaningful way. Doing research on reputable sites like the American Cancer Society can help you better empathize and prepare you to offer informed, considerate support. Avoid overloading your friend with medical information, but use what you learn to be sensitive to their needs and limitations during this time.

4. Celebrate Small Victories

Cancer treatment is a long journey, often filled with challenges and setbacks. Celebrating small victories—such as completing a round of treatment or experiencing a good day—can provide a boost of positivity. You could send a thoughtful card, bring a small treat, or simply congratulate them on reaching a milestone. These gestures reinforce that they’re not alone and that each step forward is worth recognizing.

5. Stay Flexible and Patient

Cancer journeys are often unpredictable, with good days and bad days fluctuating unexpectedly. Your friend might cancel plans last minute or withdraw socially as they cope with fatigue or emotional lows. Rather than taking this personally, show understanding and patience. Let them know it’s okay to reschedule, and don’t place any expectations on how they should feel or behave. Consistent, judgment-free support will make them feel safe and understood.

6. Encourage and Support Their Passions

Cancer can feel like it takes over every aspect of life, so remind your friend of the things that bring them joy. If they have hobbies or passions, see if there’s a way to help them engage with those activities, even in small ways. Whether it’s sending them a book by their favorite author, streaming a comedy show together, or bringing art supplies, these efforts can bring moments of joy and normalcy, reminding your friend that they are much more than their diagnosis.

Supporting a friend with cancer may feel challenging, but with empathy, patience, and thoughtfulness, you can offer them invaluable support. Every gesture, big or small, contributes to their strength and reminds them they’re not alone. Being there through the highs and lows is a gift that can lift their spirits in ways you may not even realize.